Can you hear it?

The muted, celestial music you hear in the background is the sound of angels announcing yet another school year ended. Ahh, the Hallelujah Chorus - an oldie, but a goodie. A moment of silence, please.

We always knew golf balls were important

My friend Lisa had this posted on her blog and it really hit home with me. Hope all you guys who are my "golf balls" are doing OK. You know who you are.

The Mayonnaise Jar and 2 Cups of Coffee

When things in your life seem almost too much to handle, when 24 hours in a day are not enough, remember the mayonnaise jar and the 2 cups of coffee.

A professor stood before his philosophy class and had some items in front of him. When the class began, he wordlessly picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls. He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was.

The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls. He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was.

The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else. He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with an unanimous 'yes.'

The professor then produced two cups of coffee from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar effectively filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed.

'Now,' said the professor as the laughter subsided, 'I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life. The golf balls are the important things---your family, your children, your health, your friends and your favorite passions---and if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full. The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house and your car. The sand is everything else---the small stuff. 'If you put the sand into the jar first,' he continued, 'there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls.

The same goes for life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff you will never have room for the things that are important to you.

'Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Spend time with your children. Spend time with your parents. Visit with grandparents. Take time to get medical checkups. Take your spouse out to dinner. Play another 18. There will always be time to clean the house and fix the disposal. Take care of the golf balls first---the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand.'

One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the coffee represented. The professor smiled and said, 'I'm glad you asked.' The coffee just shows you that no matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a couple of cups of coffee with a friend.'

Remember, 'Life may not be the party we hoped for, but while we're here, we should dance!'

Here's a couple of new movies for you. The first one is Jackson actually talking.



This video is long but really cute. Sorry about the lighting, again, I'm new at this. Next time I'll just put her in front of one of those spotlights they use to announce a GRAND OPENING at a car lot.


For those of you that don't speak "Emma" the words to the song are:
5 little monkies swinging in the tree
teasing Mr. Alligator, "Can't catch me!"
Along comes Mr. Alligator, sneaky as can be
And SNAPS that monkey right out of that tree...

And so on.

New hairdos, sleep teases, etc.

Emma and I have rediscovered the braid. Emma calls it "the braided". I have a feeling she will live in "the braided" or in dogears all summer long. She refused a head-shot for this photo. All I could willingly get was "the braided". If you look closely you can see that she is still covering her face, just in case I tried to be sneaky and whip around her hunched back to get her face in the picture.

So right after the boy rolled over in the middle of the night the next night, HE SLEPT ALL NIGHT LONG. This, apparently, was just ONE BIG SLEEP TEASE because he hasn't done it since. But, like my dad used to say when he finally saw you hit a good shot, "Now I know you can do it so there are no excuses!" This phrase has little to no effect on the boy because he is still calling for the milk wagon around 2 or 3 in the AM. Right now, as you can see, he is happily swinging away in dreamland. In fact, this photo was taken mid-swing; pretty darn good if I say so myself. I take back every mean thing I ever thought or said about people that have "swung" their babies to sleep. It's not a regular occurrence in our house but sometimes it must be done.

Doesn't your nephew look cute in his gorilla-wear, Tara!

And...

This is just cute. My boys.

Yes...He's advanced for his age.

Jackson rolled over last night! Granted no one actually saw him do this, and I'm not sure he was even aware that it had happened, but he did it nonetheless. At about 4am, I heard J yelling from his crib. I don't mean whimpering or fussing like he does when he's hungry - he was really yelling. (BTW - for those of you keeping score, he's still not sleeping through the night. He's going about 7 hours consistently from 8:00ish until 3am. I tried to adjust his sleep schedule so that he would do the 7 hours from 11 until 6am but it failed miserably. By waking him up at 11 to feed him again, I just lost the solid 7 hours. Then he woke up every 4 or so. Needless to say, we've gone back to the solid 7 hours beginning around 8 or so. I just have to make myself go to bed earlier. Which obviously I am NOT doing tonight. But I digress.) I padded down the hallway into his room and found him lying on his belly...with his face smushed into the bumper pads. I would have yelled too! I rolled him over onto his back and he immediately went back to sleep. So - milestone accomplished sans witnesses. Oh well, he still has to do it again while we're watching in order for it to be real.

In other news, as my friend Emily discovered at one point, our daughter is probably watching too much TV. Last night when she was asking for dessert, Andy said, "What's the Magic word?" Emma's response? "Arriba!" Thank you, Dora, for reminding us that censorship was invented by parents not to deprive children but to keep adults sane. That is all.

OK, so I realize that I was "in the light" for much of that video. Deal with it people. At least I'm taking the freakin' videos. Here's another video of Miss E working the Slip N' Slide with our neighbors across the street. Brycen is the little boy that Emma stalks every day. She spends much of her time looking out the front windows to see if Brycen's home, or if Brycen's leaving, or if Brycen's Mama's car is in the driveway - you get the idea. Today, it was close to 90 so we let the kiddos cool off in the front yard.

Who's REALLY in control here?

So, I realized/remembered that our digital camera (as old as it may be) does, in fact, take short videos. Here's one attempt from this evening. Basically, I do a lot of talking. This is not new.

Breaking news...

Teaching sophomores with 6 real school days left (finals don't count because there is minimal interaction on those days, thank God) before summer = an exercise in masochism like no other. I find myself thinking, "Please, skip English today!" with the fervency of Luke summoning the Force before he aimed for the Death Star. That is all.

Hide-n-seek.

Tonight at dinner we were having chicken fingers, macaroni and cheese, and green beans. As I had already finished my meal, I got out some dessert for myself. The Fudge Stripe cookies (with real fudge!) looked pretty darn delicious to little Miss E. So she asked if she could have one. I said she sure could, as soon as she finished her chicken. She only had about four pieces left so I felt sure this would be an agreeable arrangement. Emma replied, "Sure, Mama." She speared a piece of chicken, dipped it in the BBQ sauce and chomped on down. As she finished her bite, she reached across the table to, I thought, get a drink of milk. Her hand snaked out over her plate and stayed there covering her remaining pieces of chicken. Emma was hiding the rest of her chicken. Under her hand. In front of me. While I was watching. HIDING THE CHICKEN.

Um - news flash, Emma - I totally saw you do that. While I normally can be fooled easily these days due to my lack of sleep and that pesky infant who needs feeding and constant care, this time you're not getting anything by me. Not this time, sister. You may have been able to
wear hot pink shoes with your brown outfit, eat dry Frosted Flakes in a cup on the couch (I'm still picking rogue flakes between the cushions), and convince me to let you have a second cup of chocolate milk but this is going too far. You cannot hide the rest of your meal from me to get to dessert faster, particularly while I'm sitting right next to you. This type of behavior will lead to things like sneaking extra mints at restaurants, going 5 mph over the speed limit, and eventually you'll be strung out on samples at Sam's. This is your intervention. Part of life is cleaning your plate and part of my life is making sure you do it. But thanks for the laugh - it was hilarious. Hiding your food - really? And for those of you that just can't take it - yes, she ate the rest of the chicken and I gave her TWO cookies.

Happy May!

So, it's crazy to me that it's May. However, here are a few clues that only we teachers would notice that let us know the end of the year is approaching:
1) Spring Fever in the form of OVERACTIVE PDA infects all jr. high and high school campuses. This is disgusting on 2 levels: First, it's gross because no one should have to see to pubescent, pimply kids playing tonsil-hockey exactly 3 feet from adults, all the while oblivious of exactly how vomit-inducing their actions. Second, it's gross because you realize that at one time or another in your life you were just as oblivious; either in your own tenure on the tonsil-hockey team at your high school OR in the frat-party-alcohol-haze period that was most of our college days. Come on, you all remember that one time you made out with that one person in the middle of the room or in the hallway at that one party.
2) Complete lack of motivation. And here, of course, I'm talking about the teachers. (It's a given that all students, even the good ones, pretty much throw in the towel after mid-term reports in the 4th quarter.) I spent the entirety of my TWO planning periods today doing everything I could do NOT to work. I have poetry projects in a double stack on my floor, 5 sets of vocabulary and all my classes' Macbeth tests to grade, but what did I do this morning? I looked at John Mayer's upcoming concert dates and emailed friends. People, I actually scrolled through my Hotmail Contacts list to see who I hadn't talked to in a while so I could email them. This is the ultimate in educrastination (educator procrastination).
3) iPod usage and cell phone usage in the classroom is at an all-time high. I actually had a kid ANSWER his phone during 3rd period. The conversation went like this:
"Yo."
Kid listened for a second.
"I have to go man. I gotta give my phone to Mauk so she can write me up. Later."
Yeah - exactly.
Kids are also trying to conceal their earbuds in their hoodies. Sadly, for some of them, I let them get away with it because it's so much easier to let Alex listen to his iPod than it is to try and get him involved in the classwork. Or, I should say, involved appropriately. Yesterday when practicing personification, his contribution was, "The hotel rocked. You know, the hotel rocked?!?" Yes, Alex we all get the sexual innuendo. And your spoken italics really helped bring home the point. I appreciate that you understand personification, I would just like it more if it wasn't loaded with sexual euphemism, thank you.
4) Things like this are said on a daily basis: "So, if I get a D for 4th quarter and make a B or C on the semester exam, I still pass, right?" OR "Mrs. Mauk, what do I have to make on the final in order to pass?" My response: An effort.
Ah, education. But, I'm not in it for the pay or the accolades, I'm in it to touch kids' lives. For example, a female student pulled me aside the other day when we were talking about classes for next year. "Mrs. Mauk, I have a question and I would really value your advice." I anxiously awaited an opportunity to encourage the girl to challenge herself by taking an Honors or AP course next year. "Do you think I can handle the mental (wait for it) and physical parts of having a baby?" Me: speechless
Yes, it's these opportunities that really remind me why I got into teaching. And that was...
I'll get back to you next fall.