Happy May!

So, it's crazy to me that it's May. However, here are a few clues that only we teachers would notice that let us know the end of the year is approaching:
1) Spring Fever in the form of OVERACTIVE PDA infects all jr. high and high school campuses. This is disgusting on 2 levels: First, it's gross because no one should have to see to pubescent, pimply kids playing tonsil-hockey exactly 3 feet from adults, all the while oblivious of exactly how vomit-inducing their actions. Second, it's gross because you realize that at one time or another in your life you were just as oblivious; either in your own tenure on the tonsil-hockey team at your high school OR in the frat-party-alcohol-haze period that was most of our college days. Come on, you all remember that one time you made out with that one person in the middle of the room or in the hallway at that one party.
2) Complete lack of motivation. And here, of course, I'm talking about the teachers. (It's a given that all students, even the good ones, pretty much throw in the towel after mid-term reports in the 4th quarter.) I spent the entirety of my TWO planning periods today doing everything I could do NOT to work. I have poetry projects in a double stack on my floor, 5 sets of vocabulary and all my classes' Macbeth tests to grade, but what did I do this morning? I looked at John Mayer's upcoming concert dates and emailed friends. People, I actually scrolled through my Hotmail Contacts list to see who I hadn't talked to in a while so I could email them. This is the ultimate in educrastination (educator procrastination).
3) iPod usage and cell phone usage in the classroom is at an all-time high. I actually had a kid ANSWER his phone during 3rd period. The conversation went like this:
"Yo."
Kid listened for a second.
"I have to go man. I gotta give my phone to Mauk so she can write me up. Later."
Yeah - exactly.
Kids are also trying to conceal their earbuds in their hoodies. Sadly, for some of them, I let them get away with it because it's so much easier to let Alex listen to his iPod than it is to try and get him involved in the classwork. Or, I should say, involved appropriately. Yesterday when practicing personification, his contribution was, "The hotel rocked. You know, the hotel rocked?!?" Yes, Alex we all get the sexual innuendo. And your spoken italics really helped bring home the point. I appreciate that you understand personification, I would just like it more if it wasn't loaded with sexual euphemism, thank you.
4) Things like this are said on a daily basis: "So, if I get a D for 4th quarter and make a B or C on the semester exam, I still pass, right?" OR "Mrs. Mauk, what do I have to make on the final in order to pass?" My response: An effort.
Ah, education. But, I'm not in it for the pay or the accolades, I'm in it to touch kids' lives. For example, a female student pulled me aside the other day when we were talking about classes for next year. "Mrs. Mauk, I have a question and I would really value your advice." I anxiously awaited an opportunity to encourage the girl to challenge herself by taking an Honors or AP course next year. "Do you think I can handle the mental (wait for it) and physical parts of having a baby?" Me: speechless
Yes, it's these opportunities that really remind me why I got into teaching. And that was...
I'll get back to you next fall.