Max says, "Meep. Meep."

So, before we left for our holiday trip through the middle of the country, I took the cats to the vet. Over my better judgment, I might add. Our cats don't go outside. They barely leave our bedroom. I haven't had them to the vet since 2008. I see no reason to give them $50 shots and a $40 "physical exam" EACH so they can spend their twilight days snoozing in the sun even more comfortably. Zoey is terrified of the outdoors and Max never makes it past the front yard even when he bolts.

So, taking them to the vet was not even on my radar until Dec. 8. I found a present left for me in Emma's closet. And as it contained blood, I was concerned. I managed to ignore this concern with the usual affirmations that cats shit blood all the time. This was no big deal. Seeing as how there was no way to tell which cat left the colorful gift, why would I pay for BOTH of them to be checked. For a few precious days, my denial was working. Then on Dec. 10, I found a TOOTH on the floor of my bedroom. It was huge. And by huge, I mean that I originally thought it was a twig Jackson had dragged into the house. I determined that the tooth belonged to Max. Now I had 2 animal medical issues and the overdue guilt from not taking them to the vet for their regular visits so of course, I caved.

The only appointment I could get was on Friday before we left town for 10 days. Zoey was determined to possibly have hyper-thyroidism and required a $90 blood test. Max has tape worms - very common, I'm told and contracted by contact with fleas which we don't have and the cats couldn't have been in contact with because THEY DON'T GO OUTSIDE. Anyway, one pill for Max, a blood-test for Zoey, 3 solid inches of stress-shed cat hair for the vet's nurse to clean up and $300+ later, we went home. Where Max proceeded to BARF all over the floor of our room, effectively negating the treatment we'd just paid $16 for only 23 minutes earlier. And yes, it was Friday so I had to wait until Monday when we were out of town to call them to find out what to do about Max. *insert 10-day time lapse here* Called the vet, Zoey is NOT hyper-thyroidic (and yes, I just made up that word), Max needed another $16 pill and when would I like to schedule BOTH of their $180+ teeth cleanings? Holy Highway Robbery, Batman.

Picked up Max's 2nd pill this evening at 4:30. (You can see where this is going, can't you?) After attempt #1 failed with just me and Max involved (in which the pill was placed a considerable way down his throat and he proceeded to HOLD HIS BREATH and NOT SWALLOW while bicycling his back claws into my abdomen until I released him and he hacked the pill back up onto the bedspread), I enlisted Andy. Andy remembered that the nurse suggested we roll him in a blanket and "chase" the pill with water from a TURKEY BASTER to force him to swallow the pill. This we tried. 3 times. The pill came back up each time in various stages of disolvement and I think Max aspirated about a teaspoon of water. At this point, I took out some wet food and pulverized the remaining fragments of the pill into the food. Max proceeded to LICK ALL THE GRAVY OFF each piece of meat without ingesting any of the actual food. I think, perhaps, he ultimately ate about one tenth of the pill. It was like Max was the Roadrunner and I'm Wylie Coyote constantly pursuing and trying things that EVERYONE ELSE KNOWS will not work.

Did I mention that during none of this 2 hour 15 minute "battle" did Max hide under anything more substantial than the Christmas tree?! (Yes, it's still up people - don't judge me.) He was gloating - Look, lady, there's no way you're going to get me to take the pill. And if you do, I'll just hack it up on your floor again. And then you'll step in it. While I sleep on your pillow.
And so, it has begun. Tonight was merely a mild skirmish in a war that must last at least until Monday because, of course... the vet is closed tomorrow.

Photo Spectacular

Since we've had a lot going on in the past month, I've posted some pictures to our web albums. Here are a few to tempt you. Click on the actual picture and go to the web album that has all the pictures from our trips!



This picture is of Day 1 at Disney World for Thanksgiving with the Mauks. We had a blast! Also, previous to our DW trip, I attended the NCTE National Convention again this year, which was close to home in Orlando. My favorite part is meeting and talking with YA authors. Click on the picture of E and J and topiary Mickey to see all the DW pics and the other authors I got to meet!

Here's the tree. Click on the tree pic to see the FEW other pics of Christmas cheer and home improvements we've made since October.

Holiday Spirit

I have never claimed to be a Christmas enthusiast. Mostly, I feel that Christmas (for many people, some of whom I know personally) equals greed. I try to avoid getting caught up in the melee and go about my business of ignoring the over-blown Christmas schizophrenia that obsesses America's consumers. Now that the kids are getting older, I find myself wanting to "do more" - not for me - but for them. I dreaded putting up the tree this year because of all the work it would entail but after Andy got it to the house and I saw the look on Emma's face after we had it lit up, I got excited myself. Putting on the ornaments was fun again. Watching Emma struggle with just the right placement of our 57th (I'm not kidding) Disney princess ornament - was just as fun as if I was doing it myself. We had hot cocoa even though it was 78 degrees outside and listened to Christmas tunes. When we finished and she trotted off to bed (and I relieved the over-heavy 4-foot-high portion of the tree by more evenly distributing some ornaments), I was tired but happy. Seeing Jackson's face the next morning when he woke up and exclaimed, "Mama, the Christmas tree has fire (his word for the lights). That's so cool!" was just as amazing. My Christmas dishes are out, complete with potholders and placemats. The Christmas movies are playing. The Christmas music is wafting through the air. Emma and I made cookies and I'm finishing the Christmas cards tonight. Then we'll be heading out take a tour of Tallahassee Christmas lights. All of that to say that, through my children, I've been infected with Christmas spirit again. I'm not sure it was completely gone but it had been slowly beaten down in the past few years by cynicism and over-commercialization. I'm so glad to rediscover the joy of Christmas through my kids. Pictures of our dolled-up holiday abode soon to come.